When We Run Out of Grandparents . . .

I work mostly with child abuse and neglect cases. The public knows little about them.  They are confidential. They are so confidential that nobody can talk about any particular case at all.  This is primarily to protect the children, but also to protect parents, who may or may not have big enough problems for the State to remove their children. 

Of course you read on Facebook about the State taking children.  Every time that happens in one of my cases, I’ll send a friendly little subpoena to the person who published the information and invite him or her down to the Courthouse for a hearing on contempt of Court.  The judge usually does not put the person in jail for the first time.

One thing that I can tell you is how many we file. We have a two County Circuit, with two prosecutors’ offices and a total population of 40,000.   In 2017, we filed more than 220 child abuse and neglect cases.  If the 2018 rate keeps the way it’s going in the first two months, we’re going to file over 300 in 2018.

In more than half the cases, drug use by the parents forms the basis of the problem of parenting.  Basically, with a kid, you need to be on your “A” game. If you are zonked out, you won’t make it past the minor leagues.

In West Virginia, opiates and  methamphetamine appeared to be the major problems. Nationally, those are also problems, with a little more heroin and cocaine drawn into the mixer.  Drug use varies year by year, and certain drugs wax and wane in popularity. But there is an alarming and even growth in the number of zonked out parents. That never goes down, only up and up.

In West Virginia, we have a Department of Health and Human Resources which is charged with child protection. We have specialized CPS workers to respond and manage situations.  We have a moderately efficient centralized intake hotline. [See note 1]

When the State has to take custody of a child, the DH HR will try to find a place for the child with a relative.  Understand that when you move a kid suddenly, it’s a shocking act, even when you are moving them from an abusive home. Some kids think that child abuse and neglect are normal behaviors and that every kid had the same experience. They’re kids. Give them a break. Moving a child to a relative at least moderates the damages.

There are some ancillary charitable or faith-based programs to help these kids.  The Disciples of Christ church in West Virginia periodically collects stuff for backpacks to give to children who are taking from the home.  I very well remember a kid last year who got a backpack. In it, he found his own new tooth brush. He was all excited – he had never had his own tooth brush before.

Jesus wept.

Grandparents are a wonderful resource in raising children.   I’m not sure if it “takes a village to raise a child,” but it is a lot easier if you have a stable extended family.

So abused and neglected children often in end up being placed at grandma’s and grandpa’s. That’s not the only way they get there – sometimes the parents are so drug-addicted or so disinterested that they will consciously decide to put their children with their grandparents. And that is a loving act by those parents.

God loves grandparents.

But there is a fly in this ointment.

More and more parents are drug-addicted.  Some of these folks will quit using drugs. The drugs popular now are largely more addictive, so people have a harder time beating them. In 20 years, these people are going to be grandparents. Many of them will still be drug-addicted.  Drug use and abuse and neglect are both increasing, and I don’t see me any short-term slowing of the rate. So, in a year, we’ll have a few more; in five years, much more; and in 10 years, it will be overwhelming.  And year by year, we’ll have fewer family members to participate in care.

The “orphanage” scarcely exists these days. Part of the reason is that people live longer, so they have more opportunity to be grandparents and be available for care. That is unlikely to continue. So the question is:  How are we going to care for these kids in the absence of families.

I really don’t care whether it is government care, private care, faith-based care, or whatever.  Private/faith-based care  may be preferable because there is less financial incentive and most do it simply for love alone.

That’s not to say that foster homes are not unloving.  I consider foster parents to do an amazing job for relatively little money.  They clearly are motivated by love of children.  I consider human beings to be decent people who deal with children from the standpoint of love.  Oh, in my job, I do see a lot of exceptions, but then I don’t hang around normal people.   

Policy makers should think ahead to what’s on the horizon, but they seldom do. What the public focuses on is the current problem. Policy makers right now are focused gun control, because a new set of potential voters are getting active. We are continually focus on taxes because that affects our pocketbooks.  Social security will continue because the largest, most-likely-to-vote block of voters is directly affected.

But it shouldn’t be a winner-take-all society.  Every problem, left unchecked, with have to be dealt with.  Dealing with them later requires harder choices than dealing with them sooner. These children are coming, ready or not.

Mizpah?


Note 1 – I understand the centralixe intake online. I didn’t used to.  Maybe it helps keep cases from falling through the cracks.. However, I have bit of an unfortunate history with the hotline as a prosecutor. When I call the hotline, I don’t call it just for shits and giggles. I am presented with something that I’m not qualified to make a judgment about, and I want a CPS worker get out of bed and go see what’s going on.  Usually, I’ve already gotten out of bed, often gone to the Courthouse, and that’s just the duty that we all signed up for.  So when the person receiving the call says “I’ll have to run this by a supervisor,” as they did last weekend,  I am like liable to react somewhat poorly.  Like I did last weekend.  Some workers conclude that I am a code 18. I can live with that.  Just take care of the children.